25.6.11

quick! dream

last night i dreamt i was in a big city, hidden away at some clinic for crazies. an old lady comes in i think i'm related to her and she tells me my great grandma has died. she starts to explain whats going on and as she does she starts to get younger. she draws little pictures on paper, and then she sticks her hands in my mouth and feels around my teeth and tongue, then she draws them out and points out all the cracks and cavities, telling me life is is hard and short. the nurse comes in and takes her away. then several others are in the room. a few girls and a small black man, who is my case worker, he brings me folders and papers that i dont understand and he tries to talk to me but i cant hear him through the sadness im feeling. some of the girls are talking close to us, i see that one of them is wearing a flowing red shirt and she has deep dark scars marching up her arm, im drawn to them like art. i envy her. she has fresh scratches on her elbows. i need those. i covet and lay back in the huge couch im on. the black man continues to talk but now im floating off.

i wake up slowly and softly... like cotton is in my head.

hrm. [typing too fast, punctuation is actually bothering me today]

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