Wednesday, July 9, 2008

dream [a long one]

i'm at an amusement park. with alot of people i know. i'm walking with a small group and we're waving and saying hi to the people we pass. we get on a few rides and laugh at how dangerous and terrifying they are. some are water slides with crazy low edges, some are inflatable beds in wind tunnels and no body armor or gear. we even get on one where you to go into a huge glass sphere with water sliding up the edges somehow with small plastic colorful balls swishing back and forth and alligators you have to dodge. i got on this ride, i lived, and it was fun as shit. the park is huge. and we still have yet to see the crown jewel, the ultimate adventure, and they are more than willing to show us. a man in a purple shirt comes up and says everyone is gathering, you should be there. its starting soon, don't want to miss it. oh and some of you won't come back. i must be some kind of death nut because i can't even tell you how excited i am. i drag my friends with me and we head for the other side of the park. when we finally get there we realize this is no ordinary ride. this is going to be a battle. and a bloody one. ill try to describe this the best i can so bear with me. the "game area" is a huge covered arena, underground, with a few slits in the surface level to let sunlight in through. in the arena itself there are staircases and elevators and ramps going across from wall to wall and several varying stories up. only one of these touches the floor, which is covered in dirt, broken appliances, and pieces of animals. my adrenaline goes up. whats going on?
[quick note: my hair is long and black, and i touch it often and shake it more]
so now were being ushered into the "beginner room" as our guide refers to it. he says now. were going to let you out onto those ramps and stairs. and we're going to release our babies. everyone is getting antsy, some of us are ready and we slowly find each other. we have the stone looks of people with dangerous pasts and i feel a strange unfamiliar sense of pride when they come near me. let's do this, yes? the doors open and all of us creep out to the highest ramp. me and my people jump down to about the 3rd from the top. the doors close behind us and the whole room goes back up to the surface, as if on a huge elevator string. this is weird. but it feels good to be jumping and grabbing like ninjas. heh. we hear a strange noise coming from below. some of the others go down to look for the source. me and mine think this stupid and wait. we watch as they creep down down down. and then they start screaming and running. zombies. they re releasing zombies on us. shit. so now we head down. time to kill and avoid and protect. fun fun fun fun. i jump on zombie faces and punch zombie guts, i'm scared, so scared, but i fight and run and jump. i want to live after all. some of these people are my friends and i watch as they get eaten or get torn apart. there are children in here too. what the fuck is going on. a woman grabs me by the wrist and i turn and almost kick her before she puts her hand over my mouth and tells me to shut up. shes tall and she has deep brown hair and for some fucked reason shes wearing a huge wedding dress. dear god this dream keeps getting stranger. she pulls me away and we find a ledge that runs around the edge of the arena and we just watch. zombie mayhem. bedlam and torture.
[here i wake up a little. tom tells me hes going to work]
when i fall back into the dream i'm still where i was standing before. there's a man near me and i know that in some way i am connected to him. i run to help him and then suddenly i hear this blaring screeching sound coming from the floor. i look over a railing and see neon signs flashing. they blink BAIT. and arrows point to a cave entrance. the zombies stop the attack and file down to the entrance. its over. i guess we won. the ledges around the edges of the arena slide out of the walls, and they have chairs and tables on them. strange. people are hurt and dying. i start to walk the ledge and evaluate damage. some cringe and bleed and others are perfectly fine. i see a child crying and i run to her. whats wrong? i lost my flower. its gone. i miss it. she belongs to a man i know someone named bear? a huge guy. but where is he? out of the corner of my eye i see a man fall to the floor and i rush over to him, his face is young and handsome and he knows me. hes been bitten. out of nowhere a woman runs up and says quick! we have to be quick! and she pushes me to the ground where i start to convulse and twitch, she falls and does the same. i throw up some brown disgusting slime and lay there panting. the woman gets up and says you got it out. you got it out. i try to stand and realize the man is in front of me, and hes fine. he picks me up and holds me.
[and of course i fall in love]
[it's like we were always meant to be. cheese]
then i remember something and i take off running. out a door near me and into the sunlight and then down a path and into a small hole in the ground. i'm in a small mossy green room and it has little tiny furniture in it. i say where are you and the frog steps out of the little tiny kitchen. i tell him to give me the flower, i know its in his freezer. he laughs and hands it to me.its small and glass and purple and green. its so pretty. i walk back to the arena. i need to give it to the little girl. the man is still standing there, waiting for me. he puts his hand on my waist and we walk. i find the little girl and give her her flower. she laughs and runs away. its time to leave. i have to get out of here. how long have i been asleep? as we head for the door i see someone i know and i go to him. its my old friend robert, and hes in a wheel chair. he's paralyzed. i say robert? what happened? did the army do this to you? what happened? and i start to cry. my man behind me lays a hand on my back. robert turns his chair and looks at me. his face is mean and scarred. he says at least i didn't do this to myself. i didn't have THAT luxury. i know he's talking about my arm. robert's wife is there too. she stands like a statue next to him, crying a little. i reach to her and in her ear i whisper, i'm going to get married. i guess you guys can't come. please take care of him. then i hug robert again. and i'm still crying.

and that's how i wake up.

crying and shaking and worried id still be in that arena.

yep. what a motherfucking dream eh?

woo. i'm exhausted.

some points
-i always fall in love with the men in my dreams.
-me and my small group, we were heroes. almost gods among the other people. the way they looked at us and grabbed for our hands. it was amazing.
-the zombies were covered with clotted blood and they had facial expression. which made them even more disgusting. when i bashed their heads in they were hollow.
-i was actually also in love with a woman in this dream. confusing.
-the dream was so deep and complex. i loved it.
-the way that me and my group moved was like those urban jumpers. it was such an amazing feeling. i want to get in shape and try it now. its like flying. it took my breathe away.
-other people in my dream included aunts and uncles, my little brother, dawnelle and bryan, tom, jonathon, and my grandfather. creeepy. two of those people are dead.


alejandro baez said...

I don't know if I could survive two nights of dreams like that. I would have stayed fighting zombies and at least find some direction, you kill them and they come back. Scary stuff!

.när'sĭ-sĭz'əm. said...

lol, i woke up so TIRED.
its like i didn't get any rest.
i need to learn how to sleep in PG13.